Crisis center gets boost from beauty firm

MANILA, Philippines—Like breast cancer, abuses against women in the Philippines are as rampant and as deadly if left undetected.

“There are a lot of kinds of abuses–from the physical, emotional and even financial. But some of these abuses, they (women) don’t recognize as such. Dinadaan sa tiis (they simply endure the pain),” said Women’s Crisis Center (WCC) director Theresa Balayon.

The most usual form, though, is “intimate-partner violence”—or abuse among married or unmarried couples—based on the average 8-10 calls received by WCC’s lifelines (tel. 9225235 and 9267744).

“Among the cases, the most common is battery. The profiles or statistics on reported cases are misleading because for one reported case there must be 8 or 10 more,” added Balayon.

It’s crushing to hear that at this age and time, women–rich or poor, successful or jobless, Filipino or foreigner—still fall victim to various abuses like rape, incest, prostitution, trafficking, and, more recently, unwitting exposure to pornography.

But if there’s any good news, it is that the center was the first to be awarded about P700,000 in funds raised by Avon for its latest campaign, “Speak Out Against Domestic Violence.”

The beauty company, which has undertaken aggressive steps against breast cancer, has added this advocacy to its cap to support awareness, education, prevention, and direct service programs against domestic violence.

Close to heart

“Avon, as a company for women, has been very keen on choosing a crusade that enables and empowers women to speak out. The crusade is close to our hearts, especially since it is an issue that continues to affect a lot of women and their families,” said Bob Briddon, Avon Philippines president and general manager.

The money from the sale of the “empowerment necklace” and Avon lotions will be used to extend WCC’s helplines for four more hours daily—even on weekends—starting this month.

“We will also train Avon sales reps how to respond to a woman in crisis, for us to restore the humanity that has been lost to violence,” said Balayon.

She warned that oftentimes, violence enters psychologically before it manifests in the physical through coercion or verbal abuse.

“Parang pag hindi ka mahuli sa tingin, mumurahin ka (if looks can’t stop you, you’d be abused verbally). There’s also financial abuse. Hindi ka bibigyan ng sapat para sa mga pangangailangan mo (You won’t be given enough money for your needs). So by the time it reaches the physical, sagad na ang self-esteem mo (your self-esteem would be at its lowest),” she said.

Anamabel Garcia, coordinator of crisis intervention counseling program, recalled the case of a pregnant housewife who went to the center after her jealous husband pointed a gun at her private part.

The woman, who was carrying their third child, shoved the gun but was still seriously hurt with nine slugs embedded on her thigh.

“Recently I talked to her. Through our intervention, the man changed for a while and did not beat her up anymore, but the emotional abuses were still there. Maybe it was God’s will that the man died later on,” Garcia said.

But even well-educated women are not exempted from violence—like that of a female judge, whose lawyer-husband perennially belittled her, until he finally dragged her out in the street during a nasty fight.

“The husband has a tendency of putting her down. She knows herself, she’s really smart. But the guy is conditioning her mind na hindi siya magaling (that she’s not good),” said the counselor.

Value self first

To prevent such abusive situations, Garcia said it was important for women to value themselves first and to affirm their rights as an individual.

“How should a woman look at herself? My advice to women is they have to be very keen with what’s going on in the relationship. If you’ve observed that you’re being controlled, you have to be very open to discuss it with the person. You don’t have to separate immediately,” she said.

“There should be respect and care for each other. When you start to feel these things are not present anymore, deal with it. Don’t put it aside,” stressed the psychologist.

Donations in cash and kind are welcome at the Women’s Crisis Center, which is located on the 3/F, ER-Trauma extension annex building of the East Avenue Medical Center in Diliman, Quezon City. –Allison Lopez, Philippine Daily Inquirer