How to survive criticism, crazy co-workers and office politics

Take a quick look around you, whether you are at home, in the office or at school. There will always be some people who are more sensitive than others. Some people easily shed tears while others are seemingly unaffected. But just how sensitive are you? Are your feelings easily hurt or are you so callous you often make insensitive remarks? Obviously, everyone is built differently but for those of you who always seem to be the victim of insensitive remarks, here a few tips to toughen up:

When someone criticizes your work, inflate your ego a notch or two so you don’t feel like you’re not up to the task. Make it their problem for not understanding your work, do not make it yours. Of course, bear in mind that this is all done silently in your head to psychologically arm yourself when the criticism is thrown at you. After all, sometimes criticism is thrown at you as a form of psychological warfare. The idea is not to get yourself tangled up in whatever issues your detractor has. Often a strong critic means a mirror image of what your detractor is afraid of doing themselves or a deflection from their inadequacies.

Sometimes it’s not about you. Have you ever walked into the office of your boss and get mud slung at you even if you have nothing to do with the project at hand? Sometimes people in the office bring their personal problems to work. As unprofessional as that sounds, it does happen. Once in a while, everyone gets in the line of fire and becomes collateral damage. And when somebody is having a bad day at home or in their personal lives, some poor sap often becomes the doormat or the scapegoat for this person. When that happens, try to be understanding and reassure yourself it’s not about you.

Develop selective hearing and listening. Some people in the office need to vent and more often than not it becomes a one sided rant about some issue. To show some support or be a team player, go ahead and listen over a cup of coffee as your colleague goes off ranting and raving, but be selective about what you are listening to. Also make sure you listen and say nothing, do not contribute or add fuel to the fire. This way you show your support without getting involved.

Don’t be the office cry baby. In any office, there is always one person who cries at the drop of a hat and imagines every criticism is about him or her. Crying in the office is taboo. If you have to cry, go outside. A woman who cries in the workplace will always be looked down upon by her male counterparts. Women who cry in the office kind of sets women back a few decades. So toughen up. If you must cry excuse yourself and go somewhere sight unseen. It also helps if you have a valium or anti-anxiety meds nearby. In order to survive a tough office you have to suck it up and breathe after you leave the office. Never show a sign of weakness unless you want to get slaughtered.

Have the ability to differentiate the difference between constructive criticism and someone being a total bitch. When criticism is given to you in a constructive manner sit down and listen thoroughly. Not only will you learn something from the points being discussed it can help improve your work tremendously. There is always something to learn from someone even if they seem like the biggest idiots.

Avoid people with political agendas. For some people their ambition holds no bounds these are the people I personally can’t stand. Ambition and hard work is a formidable trait but not everyone can maintain a sense of morality and good values when climbing the ladder. Just remember a few things on the way up: Do not cheat, lie or steal. You may get away with it some of the time but not all of the time and once you have been found out the fall from the top is mightier than the bottom. Political people in the office are worse than corrupt politicians because they can’t get impeached!

In any environment we belong to there will always be good and bad people you have to deal with. The trick is how to survive the nasty ones and coming out unscathed. The idea is to just do your best at work and try to keep yourself from being bitten while you’re swimming with the sharks. Keep a good set of values and try to treat everyone fairly, someone once told me karma is so instant its digital. I firmly believe that so if you have to work with a bunch of nasty people don’t stress after all you may be the nasty one to them and you just don’t know it. –Malu Fernandez, Manila Standard Today